Loving her was Red
by hazelheart93
Summary: 4 drabbles from different POV's about their feelings for Elena Gilbert. [1.Ch: Matt; 2.Ch: Stefan, 3.Ch: Elijah, 4.Ch: Damon.]
1. Losing her was blue like I'd never known

**Hello my lovelies. This story will contain 4 different one-shots from different POV's (not telling who the others will be, suspense and all, but if you ask nicely I might give you a tip :)) All of them will give us some inside into their feelings for the wonderful person of Elena Gilbert. The lyrics in the beginning and end are from Taylor Swift's Red. I hope you enjoy and tell me what you think so far.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries or the lyrics of the song.  
The only thing I own is my creepy mind, my love for Elena Gilbert and my laptop :)**

**Fist up: Matt Donovan.**

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**_Touching her is like realizing all you ever wanted was right there in front of you_**

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He tries to stop watching, but he simply can't. Every time he adverts his gaze, the soft sound of her laughter makes him look back. At the sight of her bright adorning eyes looking at someone else, his heart clenches painfully.

She used to look at him like that. Only him.

Her rosy lips pull into a wide smile, her doe eyes filled of love and admiration for the man next to her. It makes him want to pull her in, hold her close and never ever let go of her again.

His eyes involuntarily flicker over to the hand, which is slowly trailing up and down her arm. As he watches, he remembers how he used to caress her soft cheeks, how he used to kiss her warm lips.

She was the first girl, he had ever kissed, ever touched – ever loved. He will never forget how he felt while kissing her. He will never forget the way his heart pounded against his chest, when she looked up at him after the kiss – how she used to whisper that she loved him.

He looks away. He can't do this. He can't keep remembering her like that. It's not right. She has moved on, he has to too. But how can he? How can he forget something so good? Something so right? She was his first love and you can never forget your first love.

_She has._

He knows she has. And what's more painful is that he knows, he could've given her everything she wanted in life. A family. Children. Happiness.

But she chose the other road, the dangerous road. And it burned her. And with her, it burned him. Every time he looks at her, he sees their life, his life – everything it could have become, everything he lost.

He still loves her. He will always love her. And this love is more painful than anything he has ever felt. He knew from the moment she had first entwined her fingers with his, that he wanted to grow up and grow old with her.

Now, she would never grow up. She would forever be like this and it was all his fault. He was the reason the love of his life had died.

She had died for him.

She had given up her live, so that he could have one. And for that, he loved her and hated himself even more.

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**_Losing her was blue like I'd never known_**

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**Let me know what you think..**

**xo hazel.**


	2. Missing her was dark gray all alone

**Hello my lovelies, here is the second chapter to this little collection. I hope you enjoyed the thoughts of Matt, well this time we will be in a different head..**

**Next in line is: Stefan Salvatore**

**Disclaimer: you know, I don't own TVD, nor the lyrics. I just own my mind and this story. :)**

**Enjoy!**

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**_Memorizing her was as easy as knowing all the words to your old favorite song_**

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Her warm body is moulded against him, fitting perfectly against his. Even though they are supposed to watch a movie, his eyes are closed. His hearing is only focussed on her. On her breathing, the tiny movements she is making, her heart beat – everything is still familiar, yet so different.

"_Stefan_."

Her gentle voice causes his eyes to flicker open. "Are you sleeping?" She asks, a hint of amusement in her voice. The corner of her mouth is quirking up slightly, a sight he hasn't seen in a long while, one eyebrow raised playfully.

"No." He replies, a smile of his own stretching on his face. "I was just relaxing."

She nods and leans back against him. "I missed this." She mutters and he doesn't has to ask what she is talking about.

Because he had too.

"I'm hungry." She sighs, but before she can stand up, he's already on his way to the kitchen. He grabs a blood bag from the refrigerator and in no time at all, he is back.

She takes it with a smile and he watches her unsure movements. It's different than usual. She had always been so sure of what she did. But now, ever since her transition, he sees something else in her; a whole new person, and he can't help but fall in love with her all over again.

He loves this, loves watching her. Leaning about her new self as she does. He can't stop his eyes from following her every movement. He had already lost her once, he will never let that happen again. It had been too much to bear, he can never ever go through that kind of pain again. No, he belongs to her side and only death can change that.

"I love you." He says as she finishes her blood bag. "I will always love you."

She smiles at him, her eyes showing exactly what he is feeling. Forever. And he hopes that it will truly be that, because loosing her again would crush him. He couldn't survive life without her. She was Elena, his light, the love of his life.

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**_Missing her was dark gray all alone_**

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**I know it's really, really short, but I think I've/Stefan has made his point..**

**Let me know what you think..**

**xo hazel.**


	3. Regretting her was like --

**Hello lovelies, here's the next chapter, I know it's ridicioulsly short, but I never said anything about them being long. Maybe I should change the description to 4 **

**And starring in this chapter is Elijah Mikaelson(, duh.)**

**Disclaimer: you know, I don't own TVD, nor the lyrics. But I do own the story.**

**Enjoy and please do review!**

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**_Regretting her was like wishing you never found out love could be that strong_**

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Elijah Mikaelson regretted a lot of things. Regretted putting his trust into his younger brother time and time again. Regretted loving Tatia, regretted caring for Katerina, but he could never regret the trust he held for Elena.

It was the one thing he could never regret.

She had betrayed him, yes, but he understood and he would've, no, had done the same. Family above all, it was the reasoning behind both of their every move. She was more like him than anyone else he had met in over a thousand years. She understood him better than anyone.

And somewhere along the way, this understanding had found it's way into his heart. Elena Gilbert had found her way into his heart. Now, she was settled in there, reigning and controlling it without even knowing. And no force could ever remove her from there.

Regardless to his oath to never care again, he had fallen in love.

He was in love with Elena Gilbert. Still he couldn't regret it.

She was everything he had ever wanted in life, but the one thing he would never have. Her heart didn't belong to him and he knew it.

That was the reason, why he was in New York instead of Mystic Falls right now. That was the reason why he was standing on his balcony in the 18th floor and watching the millions of lights on the ground and the millions of lights in the sky.

Being a vampire enabled him to see the stars even in a city like New York, but tonight all he could see, while watching them, was the sparkle in Elena's eyes, which she got when she was being challenged. The dancing light in her chocolate brown doe eyes as she looked at him daringly, the tiniest ghost of a smile on her lips.

He closed his eyes, relishing in the memory of her warm skin under his fingertips and the feeling it had given him. The only times he had touched her had either been too tender, too light or too forceful. Maybe this was his only regret regarding Elena Gilbert.

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**_Forgetting her was like trying to know somebody you've never met_**

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**I really hope you'd leave me some reviews :)**

**xo hazel.**


	4. But loving her was red

**Hello lovelies, dun-dun-dun here's the finale.**

**And who could it be? Yes, of course, Damon Salvatore.**

**Disclaimer: you know, I don't own TVD, nor the lyrics. But I do own the story.**

**Enjoy and please do review!**

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**_Fighting her was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there's no right answer_**

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He wakes up by the light touch on his cheek. Opening his eyes, they find the warm chocolate one's of the woman, who holds his heart.

She's smiling at him.

And that single smile makes him feel as if he's the master of the world.

He can see it in her eyes. Their history. Their story.

From the very first night, to the last.

From thinking she was another, to joining body and soul with her.

She is his.

He remembers her hating him, laughing about his jokes, smiling at him, trusting him, looking at him with those compassionate eyes, embracing and consoling him.

But he also remembers her fire, the one that lights up when she's angry, when she wants to do something but he stands in her way. He remembers how she stands up against him or anyone else.

She is the strongest woman he has ever met.

Everything about her, makes him fall deeper in love with him. He can't fight it. He doesn't even want to.

Because she is Elena Gilbert. She is the woman, who's capable of making him happy, while tearing out his heart.

She is the woman, who makes him smile genuinely for the first time in over a hundred and eighty years.

She is the teenage girl, who became his humanity and gave him a reason to fight.

She is his warrior princess and he wants nothing but to spend the rest of his eternity by her side.

Loving her like she deserves to be loved.

"I love you, Damon." She mutters and the feeling in his heart is something he has never experienced before.

It's heaven.

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**_But loving her was red_**

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**I don't think this needs anymore words, does it? Damon the morning after. *dex feels***

**xo hazel.**


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